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One Side: Beth

Sometimes I'm recorded while I’m eating. It's jarring to spot myself on her social media – it feels like a sudden shock.

My best friend of a decade, Marielle, calls herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a bit, but it strains our friendship.

She is an extrovert, there's a constant urge the need to document everything constantly. When we eat out, her motto is, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which makes me cringe. I don’t like it when other people see her posing or filming – I get vicarious awkwardness. Another annoyance is because meals lose their warmth.

She isn’t exactly an influencer yet, but Marielle is trying to be. She makes vlogs about living in our city, her daily routine, and her work as a stylist. The material is quality, I’ll give her that, but I prefer not to be dragged into it. Sometimes I'm captured while I’m eating, or just accompanying her. Later, I appear on her feed later, and it comes like a surprise: I might be bare-faced, an awkward face or be captured mid-bite. It feels invasive.

Marielle also expects me to record her at inconvenient times. Sometimes I’ll be talking to someone else, or we’ll just be hanging out in the street. The dynamic feels like our bond has transformed into me being her free crew. She has the means to hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. Upon mentioning my unease about the situation, she dismissed it. I've been invited to a couple of brand events, which was nice, but that doesn’t make up for all the time and effort I invest helping her make content.

I’m grateful that Marielle has helped me with my career in design, but I don’t want our friendship to become merely a tally of favours. I don’t feel she's insincere or dishonest, but at times I feel that if the camera is out, we will begin acting in a way that presents a favorable image for her channel.

She will say, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and film me smiling with someone. It feels forced. It's crucial her to understand that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I love being with her, but I also desire to enjoy it without being filmed, edited, or posted for an audience. I am not a prop for her online persona.

The Defence: The Content Creator's View

I want my friend to see that the content we make together can get us an opportunity.

I love shooting content. It's more than a hobby; it's integral to who I am. Producing content and documenting experiences online enables me to show my personality and connect with people in novel forms.

I don’t see myself as a full influencer yet, but it's savvy to make money from your interests. I admire people on TikTok who pull off that aesthetic of casual, DIY content creation.

Creating content is my interpretation of living actively: noticing the nuances, posting them with an viewership that values the art behind it. It's never my aim to make my friend uneasy. Bringing her to professional gatherings was my method of offering access, giving her a chance to witness exclusive moments that could benefit her professional path too. That isn't leverage, it's simply being pragmatic.

I’d still take her to such functions even if she refused to assist me, but I want her to see the benefits the work we make together can get us: a foot in the door. I understand not all people enjoys being filmed, but sometimes spontaneity is what makes content authentic. Being recorded from time to time is part and parcel of being my friend. I'd remove anything she requested, but she has never asked yet.

I don't demand anyone to be my personal filmmaker, but companions help each other in minor capacities. I thought recording a clip here or there would be enjoyable for Beth. Innovation flourishes in partnership, and having Beth around makes projects energetic and pleasurable. I don't compel her to participate in anything, and I’d never deliberately embarrass her. But filming together occasionally is part of how I record our time together.

I cherish our friendship deeply and want to avoid content creation to drive a wedge between us. I am ready to find middle ground: like requesting permission before recording, and avoiding angles that might make her uncomfortable.

This isn’t about control, it's regarding expressing my perspective while still considering hers. Obviously content creation is not a substitute for real connection: it’s just part of how I experience life and I want her to be included in a way that’s enjoyable for both of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and her friend when they are out together?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a friend film you. I get that it's her passion, but I don’t make friends come to my work. Perhaps she can find influencer friends to collaborate with. With the uncertain future of technology, personal relationships are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
Liberty, 25

When pursuing something professionally, it's unfair to expect your friends for assistance every time, even if they have done it before. If Marielle loves creating, that doesn't imply everyone around her is content. She must to respect Beth’s privacy.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love making content and displaying her life publicly, but it isn't for everybody. It’s nice she has helped Beth’s career, but she must to listen to what Beth wants.
Emma, 27

It sounds like you value each other, so hold on to that and make sure it’s the focus in your friendship. Create some real experiences, where genuine feelings are preserved, not online archives. In fact, celebrities who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more secrecy than it seems.
One opinion, 53

Marielle appears to be neither present nor authentic when she’s with Beth – she's on the job. Both seem confused as to what’s reasonable. The solution is not found in trying to change one another, but in each setting clear boundaries around what is comfortable to them and determining if there is an acceptable compromise.
A final view, 71

Now You Be the Judge

In an online poll: is Marielle exploiting their bond?